Fight till the last breath

Daan Uijterwaal
5 min readMay 3, 2019
Photo by Ivan Diaz on Unsplash

A fight for everything you care about. Would you fight for those you love? Would you stand and risk your own life for others? Would you go to the bitter end and stand next to each other no matter the cost? I don’t know if we would. Would you? Ask yourself, take a moment to think about it. Visualize all the pain you would have to go through. Try to feel the pain in your whole body. How you would endure hit after hit fighting. Not for yourself but for those who need your help. The ones you love and the once weaker than you. See the blood on your hands and on the people next to you. Tears making their way down beaten and stressed out faces. Would you fight? Or would you fly?

I think almost all of us would say fight. Fight like a hero as our favorite movie hero. Like a king fighting off hundreds of knights trying to kill his people, his friends, his family. Slinging his sword left and right, up and down. Killing knight after knight, watching them fall one by one. Eventually being overwhelmed but still continuing the fight. Blood all over his face, screaming out loud with anger and a desperate cry for help. Trying to find the last bit of energy and power within himself to fight a few more knights. He will not survive, he knows that. He will die never the less. But he will keep fighting because he feels responsible for his people. He will eventually fall, resting against the piles of knights he has slain. Closing his eyes and fading into darkness for once and for all. No good ending, no hero story. He just dies with dignity and honor but for what cause?

Now would you fight? Let me think of a more comparable example. One that’s comparable to our lives. Would you fight alongside your girlfriend, boyfriend, wife or husband? Would you stand by his or her side through the challenges you will face? Will you defend her if you hear people say bad things about her? Or would you carry a few of his problems for him? Would you sit nights and days talking about the same things? Would you? Could you say, I will not leave him till death will do us part before marriage? These are all tough questions I know. Why would you ever have to make such a decision? We do not have to fight because we are so privileged to live in a country with peace. But that doesn’t mean we don’t fight. We fight in a different way. To heal ourselves, to overcome the troubles of our ancestors. To not let these wars happen again. To sit with our feelings, heal them and let them go. We try to not make decisions out of anger to prevent war. We are fighting our own battles inside our bodies.

That’s why you should ask yourself the question, would you fight for the people that are closest to you. If the answer is no why are you there in the first place? Make new friends that you truly love and will support through hell and heaven. If the answer is yes, are you prepared to deal with anxiety, stress, pain, forgiving, anger and discomfort? Create a version of yourself that would say yes to each and every one of these questions. Say yes to feeling angry because it is an emotion that you can grow from. You can learn from anger and figure out why it is you are angry. It probably has something to do with the way you are raised. See beyond the person that makes you angry. There is a bigger problem than that one right in front of your eyes. There are trauma’s, experiences in your life that you probably forgot about that shape you into the person you are right now. These experience can be hard and you need to stand your ground.

At that point, you are the king who is defending all that he cares about. The knights are negative thoughts and bad behavior. You need to be that king that will fight till its last breath and try to save as much as possible. There is a part of this life where you can get to. A part where you aren’t afraid of death anymore. That point will come when you have healed all the damaged parts. To get there you need to go through a lot of shit. Are you tough enough to stay and fight with your partner? Your family? Your friends? Staying is a choice and if you choose to stay then you must fight as long as you live. Make that decision before starting any kind of relationship.

I’ve done that with mine. I’ve made a conscious decision whether or not I wanted to stay in this relationship. I will because I know this is what will grow me even more than I already do. It pushes me way beyond my comfort zone making me more and more comfortable with being uncomfortable. I am young, I know I know. You don’t have to tell me that. Thanks for your worries and thanks for your support but I will not listen to you. I will not listen to you when you tell me, I can’t make that decision yet. I can, because I can do whatever I want. That is not arrogant at all, it is knowing that you will have problems with or without your partner. You just want to share your life with them, share the bad. Completely lose yourself in them and get back out to heal yourself again. It is a process, a waveform going up and down. You are the one riding this wave, trust the process because it will get better. Just don’t quit, it will not solve the problem it will only push it away for so long. It will return and slap you in the face even harder before you try to do something about it.

Fight, stand strong until your last breath. Make that decision, please. Allow yourself to do whatever is in your power to fight for yourself and the things you love.

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Daan Uijterwaal

A journey to end each day and say Today I Lived. I made the most of it!